Bringing Sexy Back--In a Few Months

Wow, I'm out of shape. I found this out this morning when I rolled out of bed and had trouble crawling from the bed to the bathroom. My shoulders hurt. My legs hurt. Parts of my body that I didn't even realize existed hurt.

All of this pain, I am sure, is a result of my workout regimen, which I shortened yesterday from one hour to half an hour, because, truthfully, I just couldn't take it anymore. I came upstairs sweaty, winded and defeated by my session of plyometrics; exercise training, according to Wikipedia, "designed to produce fast, powerful movements, and improve the functions of the nervous system, generally for the purpose of improving performance in sports."

Perhaps, though, conditioning myself as though I am or hope to be a professional athlete is my downfall? Not likely. I think my downfall is the fact that I haven't exercised for months and I'm only now getting back into the swing of things. I'm certainly not going to admit that publicly though. No. Publicly, I'm going to give everyone some excuse as to why I was unable to complete an hour of my P90X workout regimen. Yesterday, I told my husband I was sure I was unable to complete the one-hour workout because I'd only recently started eating right again. And in case you're looking for excuses not to exercise, too, here are a few that have worked for me.

• I just started my diet.
  
• I'm too tired to go on.
• I'm over the age of (your age here). (Note that this statement will not work properly if you are still in your teens.)
• My back hurts.
• My neck hurts.
• My pinky finger hurts.
• I have a cold.
• I have a stomach ache.
• My kids have to be at an event this afternoon/morning, and therefore I won't be able to work out today.
  

You get the idea.

So it is with much frustration and much pain that I must admit the sad truth: it may be a few months before I can bring sexy back. And that's a damn shame.