A year ago today, I weighed approximately 30 pounds less than I do now. Normally I tell people I've gained 15 pounds since last year. This is true. I have also, though, gained 15 pounds in addition to those 15 pounds that I tell people I have gained. Why lie? Well, for starters, it's embarrassing. I mean really, unless you're pregnant, who the hell gains 30 pounds in such a short period of time? Apparently, I do.
My husband says my weight gain is attributable to the fact that I'm not exercising as much as I used to, but, like anyone, the real problem is a matter of simple math: I'm taking in more calories than I'm burning.
I used to enjoy going to L.A. Boxing, where you can burn as many as 1,000 calories in an hour (so they say) but, in order to save money, I didn't renew my membership this year. Instead, my husband bought the P90X fitness training system for me for Christmas. It's a "revolutionary system of 12 sweat-inducing, muscle-pumping workouts, designed to transform your body from regular to ripped in just 90 days," proclaims www.beachbody.com. My husband even cleared a space in our basement, and we put some padding down on the floor so I could use the space to work out. I even went so far as to buy a pull-up bar so I could do all of the recommended exercises.
So what's the hangup, you ask? Well, I definitely don't have a glandular problem. The only real "gland" that's causing me trouble is my mouth. The other issue is that, regardless of how great your fitness equipment is, it's not going to work unless you use it. And as for the P90X stuff, it's still in the basement collecting dust.
I should be clear that I haven't entered Bonnie Grape (as in Gilbert's mother) status, yet. In fact, few people have noticed that I'm up 30 pounds since last year--either that or they're just being nice by 1) not saying anything or 2) ignoring the obvious. But when you put on a shirt that fit comfortably just a year ago and feel as though it's fitting more like a sausage casing now than a shirt, well, you see my dilemma.
I'm probably like a lot of women in that, when it comes to wanting to lose weight, I want to get instant results using minimal effort. Why else does virtually every single magazine on the rack next to grocery store checkout lines scream such headlines as, "Lose 10 Pounds in 10 Days," or "Get Your Body Beach Ready in 30 Minutes a Day." Hell, there's even a local medspa that offers a service called "WeightNot," which is, according to their Web site, "a revolutionary medically supervised weight loss program that combines human chorionic gonadotropin (HCG) injections with a low-calorie diet to stimulate rapid weight loss. Average weight loss is 1 pound or more per day, for a total of 30-40 pounds lost during the 40-day diet!" And I'll admit, the WeightNot program was tempting, even though I'm sure that somewhere under "possible side effects" is the word "CANCER."
I figure, though, that I need to go about this whole weight loss thing (again) the old fashioned way--by crawling back to the proverbial wagon, hoisting myself up, and trying to stay put this time around.
And if I should fall off the wagon again? Well, at least I'll be in good company.
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truth be told I think we all have gained weight in this family over the past year, and it is also from our mouths. So we are trying, but I personally hate excerise, the only thing I do is walk the dog. Hey your blog is great I will be back, and thanks for the nice comment on mine.
ReplyDeleteIsn't HCG what pregnancy tests measure? That cannot be a good idea, unless the idea is to induce such violent nausea you lose weight, which did, in fact, work for me every time.
ReplyDeleteI am in it with you. I am getting so close and that is the more frustrating than putting it on to me
ReplyDeleteSound like you need to try the BlackLOG guilt diet (Patent pending)
ReplyDeleteIt works on the basis :-
When you feel guilty you worry
When you worry you lose weight
when you eat on a diet you feel guilty
so...
the more you eat the more weight you lose
Please note like the money market, weight on the BlackLOG diet can go up as well as down.
If that fails I found halving McG's* food ration to be effective. It has the added bonus that he doesn't have the energy to moan about his lack of food
* An over weight lardy cat, who has been on a diet since he was 6 months old....
leekre, I'm glad I'm in good company, and thanks for dropping by my blog. :)
ReplyDeleteSouther' Mother, it's funny you should mention HCG being the "pregnancy hormone." I had a conversation last night with a friend of mine who's a genetic counselor, who'd read this post, and she was thinking HCG = Pregnancy Hormone = Possibly Weight Gain and therefore the possibility of altogether dashing the hopes of those trying to lose weight. However, you may be on target with the nausea thing. Of course I can't say one way or the other whether or not that actually works given that I haven't used the WeightNot program...
Ruth, the great thing about putting on weight is that I now enjoy shopping for shoes more than shopping for clothes, which means I spend, overall, far less on my wardrobe than I would if I were to buy both shoes as well as clothes.
BlackLOG, I like the way you think.
I'm right there with ya. I've gained about the same amount of weight since this time last year and get sick any time I step on a scale. I have yet to find time to exercise and the gym membership was one of the things we pared away when money was tight. I know I just have a lack of motivation and a mouthful of whine. And you know we aren't alone. The diet/fitness industry (think pills and bars and home weight-loss programs) has not had barely a dip in profit since the recession. The only ones in that arena hurting is gyms because that's who we get rid of and replace it will all those other gadgets and junk.
ReplyDelete